Daddy has been very tolerant lately. :/ By that I mean that he has been letting things slide like my saying "No" and my talking back to him, and my use of profanity. I am unsure how to handle this. My mouth has definitely been writing checks that my bottom can't cash. I have been fresh and snotty. It actually earned me a small spanking with his hairbrush last night...but he was FAIRLY gentle, and quick. Don't misunderstand...Daddy has spanked me a couple of times, but they were pretty quick and benign for Daddy. His punishments are usually very long and VERY severe to ensure that they leave a lasting impression, both physically and mentally. I can only attribute his lack of focus to the fact that we have a lot going on outside the home right now and his mind is extremely preoccupied. I mean, I was cursing up a storm last night and he barely batted an eyelash! I was actually having to self-correct my own vernacular!
We are both extremely stressed and busy right now. But his disinterest in correcting me makes me feel unsafe. I believe the whole reason a punishment makes me feel better (afterwards that is!) is because it shows me that Daddy cares enough to take the time and effort to correct me. It tells me that I am worth SO MUCH to Daddy that he will not let me harm myself, or our relationship, with inappropriate and destructive behavior. When he fails to do so, it begins to make me feel neglected. I know that may sound silly, but it is how I feel. I am sure there are other "subs", "baby girls", etc. out there who can understand this strange emotion. :)
I should not complain though. A respite for my bottom, however brief, is always appreciated by my lower half! ;) Daddy keeps telling me that I have gone too far with my "talking back." He says that I need a "Learning Day" very soon. I don't know if he will follow through on that threat or not, but I am not looking forward to him using his new "accoutrement". (I.E. his new wooden paddle and anal plug) The paddle is 36" long and looks more like a cricket bat than a spanking implement! If he swings that with full force I am in for a VERY rough ride! :(
So I suppose that I should just keep my mouth shut and enjoy my small amount of "spanking-free" time. I am sure that Daddy will remember all too soon what a bad, mouthy little girl I really am and give me just the punishment I deserve! I only hope I can keep myself in check until then! ;)
Sending out all the love in the world...